The Official Scot-Trek Glossary
In an effort to disprove the myth that our walkers get no say in anything whatsoever, we asked them to provide some proper definitions for some of Fred's favourite terms. Here is what Fred has to say on the matter:"... peculiarly suspicious view of the information given to them on our treks ... hmmmmmm ... non-official interpretations ... no responsibility for any of these definitions ... strenuously reject the majority if not all of them ... "
Tosca, Senior Webmaster
Please note that we can accept no responsibility for any consequences suffered by contributors to the page.
"Only 10 minutes more..."
- Oh God!
- We'll be there before dark
- What do you mean my watch has stopped?
"Almost there..."
- An absolute lie - coaxing talk so we don't give up - more successful if he adds "at the pub".
- I'm going to KILL FRED!
"You could normally see Ben Nevis from here..."
- The weather could be better
- Impenetrable mists
- White-out
"It's just a gentle incline now..."
- Your pulse rate will drop from 140 to 120
- A steep climb to the next false summit
- Breathing apparatus required
"The path sometimes gets a wee bit muddy for the next 100 yards..."
- Breathing apparatus on
- It's a quagmire for the next mile
- Not to be confused with the banks of the Limpopo
"We'll finish our lunch break in 5 minutes..."
- The painful truth
- Let's go now!
"It's just a series of undules..."
- Grade 1 walk with munros in the way!
- Perpendicular rock face
- Have you been to Alton Towers?
- The big dipper at Blackpool is actually flat.
- A mountain goat wouldn't venture there
With thanks to the brave but foolhardy Janice Thompson, Inez Gillespie, Mike Ainger, Elspeth Donaldson, Vivien McGuire, Robbie Finlay, Sandra Reid, Marion Ballantyne, Jim McKay and Elizabeth Bryson for supplying these definitions.
They will not be forgotten ... or forgiven ...